regrettable interjections

we all miss school, dont we?

...yet whilst we were at school, we wished lessons would end faster, that we could go home faster, that 'if only weekends would come faster'. we'd bask in the rays of hope - for our school to declare another day a holiday.

yet now it has 'fastly' ended, school has.

life always seems to be full of regrets - 'now that it has ended we'd wish that it didnt, that we could have done much more, that we could have been better students, that we could have made that one more friend'. isnt it a torture? to live in such a world where we always look backwards, to gd times spent, to fond memories that we almost always wish that we could relive them?

but yet, alongside these regrets would come pleasant feelings, of experiences that once were. These are the memories that we'd hold preciously close to our hearts, that give us strength to carry on, experiences that make us who we are today.

how should we say it - our past experiences are like sweet and sour tasting food? we need these memories to hold us steady, yet in holding us steady they waver us too - to think of the past, to regret, to be pained, to feel stained.

so in life there is nothing as pure pleasure, pure enjoyment? nothing good comes if there's nothing bad? everything has to be taken with a pinch of salt? seems like that to me. that living like that is realistic living - whereas those who live in dreamworld would one day finally wake up into a world of nightmares.

people would say - 'just live lah!' or 'think so much for what?'
i am slowly beginning to agree with that totally. what for think, talk about things that would dilute our experiences, pollute the naturally pleasant environment that we enjoy so much? just live for the moment, remember the past, but with these hold on to them and move forward.

imagine if you're watching a movie, and in actual fact you are broke, but you decided to catch that movie with your very good friend because you felt that it would have been worth it - and halfway through the movie your friend suddenly pops the question - 'eh i think we shouldnt have watched this movie if we couldnt afford it'. immediately that would have an effect on yourself and your friend - the regret (let's term this regrettable interjections). The moment is spoilt, and you'll never rememeber that night as the perfect one. isnt that just very sad?


perhaps then we could come to this conclusion that - nothing should be done if there is knowledge that you would regret it. if you proceed with a certain action or decision, and then later regret it - then that's fine. because at least you might have enjoyed the moments without any regrettable interjections.



im just...talking nonsense again - AND thinking too much. but i should think that what was discussed above would make SOME sense - dont you think? i hope. haha.





oh how much i miss you so...